Songs that Awaken

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Have you ever heard something so beautiful that it makes you want to cry, scream and laugh all at once? Something so beautiful that it seems to resonate inside you; it wakes parts of you up that you didn't even know were asleep, but then you realize that you don't know what those newly conscious pieces are meant for? The beauty still resonates, but now there are pieces of you that are fighting to surface and make their way to the light.

The reawakening taking place is almost painful. There are new parts of you that can now take in the light. These few extra pieces intensify the beauty. They help show you intricacies that you have always missed, but what is this new insight meant for? Are you worthy of all of this beauty? What is its purpose if it can't guide you to a place where all of these pieces can link, make you whole, and then be still? What is the beauty for, if you are still lacking the words to guide others to it so that it can be shared and silently understood?

I Will Listen to Steven Tyler

I know I'm the only one in the world right now who is watching American Idol, but Paul McDonald and a few other contestants have stolen my heart. There is something special about an artist who really wants to share something with the world, not just have their picture taken and their name screamed passionately by complete strangers. But anyway, as I was watching it tonight, Steven Tyler actually said something that made sense to me. He said something to the effect of, "You have to sing like you do when you are all alone and no one is watching." I once had a teacher tell me that character is who you are when know one is watching. It is when we are alone that we allow the largest portion of our soul to dance freely in the open. We allow it to stand before us without fear of judgment, without fear of disapproval. We allow it to show us who we really are and what we really have to offer.

Now, I don't sing, but I want so badly to write, to share truths, to create beauty, to build bridges, to heal. I want so badly to give to others as I honor my love for words and thoughts, and feelings and truth. I want so badly to be a positive, empowering voice in the conversations of peace and reality and change going on in our world. I want to be a voice for Love, Connection, and Peace. I want so baldy to help people find the gold that is created from the chaos.

I've been trying to write for weeks, and will type three or four pages on my laptop only to delete them all. I've been trying to write for an audience. Someone who doesn't know me. Someone who doesn't care. I've been writing as if they are sitting on the other side of my computer screen, judging every comma, every outlandish metaphor, and out of this world claim. They even criticize my love for the number three and it's obvious dedicated and abundant usage.

Steven Tyler answered my question, "How do I really write this book?" I have to write like no one is watching. I have to write like I pray, with all of my soul. I have to write as if I'm talking to the Universe absent of judgment, and full of Love and support. I pray with vulnerability, but in that vulnerability there is strength. I pray in times of overflowing Love and gratitude, but also in times of great fear, yet during all of those times, I stand on a solid surface of faith. I have faith that I will be lead to do the most good, that I will be lead towards the most fulfillment, and that with each step, I will be falling deeper and deeper in the arms of true Love and Peace.

I will write like I pray. I will write with vulnerability and faith. I will listen to Steven Tyler.

It Is True

It is true that you can be in love with someone before you ever see their eyes or feel their touch. It is true that you can know you are meant to be with someone for the rest of your life after only knowing them for three months. It is true that you can know where love will take you even after physical ties are broken and your love hasn’t spoken to you in five years. It is true that you can know all of this because “falling in love” is simply an exercise in memory.

The moment you “fall in love” joy fills every cell of your body and your heart; you remember who you are, who you will be, and everything, good and bad, that lies on your journey together. You remember the person at your side in all of their perfection, rinsed clean of the guilt, fear and doubt that rest on their skin. You remember how they enhance the Light that flows through you, giving life to your soul and everything it touches. You remember how they gently fit the puzzle pieces in your mind together and give you a clear picture of energy and life. You remember how their breath brings you peace of mind.

It is true that it only takes a moment to fall in love and remember it all. Your body feels it and your heart begins to decode pieces of the message for you, “Love is real. I have always known this person always and they will show me new and fascinating parts of my soul. In these eyes before me, I see everything. I see God.” Your heart then tries to pass on the message to your mind because it is here that it can be created into words and images. The purpose of this journey from the heart to the mind is to bring the initial feelings and cellular sensations into a form of reality that is more concrete and digestible. Many of us hinder this journey in order to feel safe. In a culture of reason and logic, in order to protect ourselves, remain creditable, and maintain a sense of control, we must only trust what we can see. We tell ourselves that there is no magic, no love, no perfection, no plan, no purpose, no God, and that even if all of those things were real that there is no way that we deserve any of it. We are afraid, and wrap ourselves in disbelief. We hide from love and memories of perfection because they urge us to soar through the clouds that lay above the ocean, and we are all afraid of falling.