Today’s reflection is on “Freedom from Fear,” by Aung San Suu Kyi. I’m classifying this book not only as a piece of social change literature, but also as a memoir. At first glance the book may not appear as a memoir, since it reads and feels more like a history book, composed by actual writings that were meant for Australian high school history books and a hodge-podge of copied speeches (primary sources) that are still available to us. But I will argue that these writings are indeed worthy of the title of memoir.
To understand memoir, we first have to understand that it is not the same as autobiography. Autobiography in my opinion is always boring and sloppy. In this genre it is the author’s intention to tell you everything about them, and in striving for this they end up telling you absolutely nothing. Sure, you may have a list of facts by the end that are comprised of dates and names and accomplishments, but you still really know nothing about the person, and now infer that they are full of themselves and boring.
Memoir on the other hand, aims to capture a particular time in the writer’s life or a particular theme that they have seen chasing them through the years trying its hardest to make itself visible. For me I always view memoir as a form of deep reflection, where the author is uncovering meaning and purpose, and I am part of this process as I read their words. I’ve written a memoir of my own as a writer found that this journey of discovery through the writing process was very true. Writing it helped me to discover the meaning in certain events in my life and it helped me to uncover a theme, or a string that tied seemingly random events together. When I read other people’s memoirs, I am often encouraged to find meaning in my own stories as I identify with theirs, experiencing what I believe to be the point of good literature, especially social change literature, shared humanity.
Understanding memoir as an attempt to make sense of our lives to find purpose and connection, I can honestly say that I believe “Freedom from Fear” qualifies to be placed in this genre. Throughout all of these writings Aung San Suu Kyi tries to understand her history beginning with her father’s legacy, and then decipher what her role she should play in Burma because of her understanding.
She never knew her father and the first few writings which capture his role in Burmese history are written from a historical point of view, but who can write about their own father and not begin to understand their own connection to the history he created? As you continue to follow Suu Kyi’s writings throughout the book you can see her pulling together the own themes of her life and begin to understand that her work as a Burmese historian illuminated her role as a Burmese citizen and the responsibility that she had to speak for her people that were often without a voice. By writing about her father, she appears to have discovered herself.
As a side note, I have to say that my favorite part of this book was the introduction by Aung San Suu Kyi’s husband. He helped bring her to life introducing her not only as an amazing human rights activist, but also as a wife, a mother and a daughter. I couldn’t help but cry when he wrote about the day that he and their sons were informed that her house arrest had been intensified and they would no longer be able to see her, and then I thought about her in her house now over 20 years later never being able to see her boys grow. I cried again.
So, what role do I believe that good memoir plays in social change literature? Well, first any writer writing honestly and vulnerably about themselves cannot help but create a space of shared humanity. When people are honest and transparent, their humanity shines through, and readers cannot help but reflect on their own humanity and ask themselves questions like, “What would I do in that situation? What are going to be the consequences of that action they just took? Who are the people that shaped me in the ways that the author is talking about right now?” Obviously, these reflections aren’t always deep and drawn out, but I believe they are natural reactions to reading honest text, and just by being present if not deep provides a more fertile soil for social justice.
Pipher in “Writing to Change the World” also comments on the ways that writing memoir helps the writer. She argues that they begin to find themes of importance in their lives. Things that speak to the them. It helps writers to clearly grasp and explain to themselves their passions and where they come from. She says it also helps writers to begin to discover their strengths and their weaknesses and begin to use them to their advantage in their writing and activist work, and that this form of writing helps the writer to see the links between their story and the rest of humanity as well. This understanding helps the writer to find entry points in new conversations and new initiatives.
Well, as Katy pointed out yesterday, it’s such an easy way out to write about why you aren’t writing and claim it as progress. But I think it was a necessary step. Maybe now I can actually begin a bit creatively. Stay tuned, hopefully the next entry will be a little bit of some memoir of my own.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Consumption vs Production
Yesterday I worked the North Eastern Regional NCAA hockey semi-finals, and in between selling $50 tickets to Yale alumni and proud BC (Boston College) grandparents, I found the time to finish "Writing to Change the World" by Mary Pipher. The book stirred me to life, ever page either made me laugh or cry. And the energy must have taken over my whole body because more than usual customers asked, "Are you always so smiley?" While the rest just seemed calmer than usual, wanting to chat with me instead of running to their seats.
I sat in my chair at my little ticket seller window wanting to write so badly. Quotes like "We write to discover what we think."-Joan Didion and passage by Pipher like, "Once we are immersed in writing, we forget our anxiety. Focusing on clarity and beauty clams us down," and "Any form of writing can change the world. Your goal is to find the form that allows you to use everyone of your talents in the service of what you consider to be your more important goals. You want to search for what you alone can say and then how you can say it most effectively" made me ready to write. I sat there seeing beauty and purpose in the way I string my words together in letters to my loved ones, in my journal entries, and even in my facebook status updates. My head was racing with excited characters, ways to discover the social issue most important to me, and past anecdotes that illustrated the power of empathy and the hard yet family centered life of the rural poor in Upstate New York.
This urge to write stayed with me until the end of my shift. I felt centered and full of light. For the first time in months, I felt like I was digesting social change material that spoke to me. No violent revolutions, no dichotomies, no labels write on post-it notes and mentally stick to people's back. No pessimism. I was reading about empathy, connection, honesty, authenticity, and thought all changing the world. I was reading about change happening at the level of the individual, at the level of the writer and the reader, and this individual change reaching out like a ripple in Lake Cayuga.
The excitement stayed with me. When I got home it was still there. But did I write? Did I produce anything? Did I even produce junk that could later be sifted through, leaving behind only the original thoughts, phrases, and honest observations? No, of course not.
I chose to consume instead. I ate dinner and watched Gosford Park, and through the whole thing marveled at the beautiful scenery and dresses, joyously watched and listened for snark British one-liners, and enjoyed the underlying commentary on humanity and the evils of power and oppression. How can we take away a persons life, making them nothing more than a servant, meant to notice only us, our needs, our wants, even anticipate these things before they are in our awareness? Why do we allow others to take away our lives? Why do we begin to identify not with ourselves, but with those who control us, those who are held higher in society, and those who oppress us?
I thought an consumed. My thoughts may be considered a production of sorts. But to me they were nothing more than energy. The energy that was used to produce the movie was broken down in my mind to its smallest parts. The thoughts were nothing more than the concrete illustration of a transfer of energy. It was my responsibility, as it was after reading Pipher's words, to take that energy and use it to create. But I did not. I went to sleep.
I've wrote about this consumption vs production issue in this blog before. It was during my summer in Berkeley and I wanted to write so badly, the energy that I was consuming was so powerful and transformative, yet I only managed to post a few blogs and send a few smiles. Although my addition to conversation that summer were deep and meaningful, which hasn't been the case since I've come back to Clark. Those conversations, I believe, do count as production. I was passing the energy further, creating my own rippling waves.
When I looked at the stagnation of my writing then. My over consumption and under production, I had decided was mostly due to what Pipher, and many others refer to as "the shadow self." This is the darkness that comes from fear, guilt, envy, anger and despair, according to Pipher who's major training is in psychology, so I guess this makes her more reliable than most. I accredited fear, guilt, and envy with my writer's block. I was feeling guilty that I wasn't writing. I was envious of all the beauty others were able to manifest and the talent that they had. But most of all I was fearful. Fearful that my thoughts were foolish, that my view of the world was too far fetched. I was afraid that I wasn't able to express myself clearly enough or that what I found beautiful others would find cliche. Pipher used a Mark Twain quote that really seemed to capture this, "The human race is a race of cowards. I am not only marching in the parade, I am carrying the banner."
So, now I wonder where is the fear coming from? Why do I lack the confidence to believe that my thoughts are worth sharing? Why do I keep questioning that I know something?
And then I thought back to my Education and Development classes this semester. I realized that for 18 years of my life I've been in school and told that I know nothing, that there are people out there that have written theories that truly explain my reality, and that I need to read them so that I really understand my world. I've read them. I saw value. I took them as my own theories. I lost my voice. I lost my unique addition to the conversation.
Grad school has been even worse. I feel like I lose a little of voice every class. I read a reading. I am moved and excited. Then I am bewildered at where the classroom conversation goes the next day. Everything I found relevant to my work, everything that I found profound appears to be just wasted space. I read the same pieces, yet still have no place in the conversation. But the point of this independent study is to rediscover my voice, my place as a change agent.
I sat in my chair at my little ticket seller window wanting to write so badly. Quotes like "We write to discover what we think."-Joan Didion and passage by Pipher like, "Once we are immersed in writing, we forget our anxiety. Focusing on clarity and beauty clams us down," and "Any form of writing can change the world. Your goal is to find the form that allows you to use everyone of your talents in the service of what you consider to be your more important goals. You want to search for what you alone can say and then how you can say it most effectively" made me ready to write. I sat there seeing beauty and purpose in the way I string my words together in letters to my loved ones, in my journal entries, and even in my facebook status updates. My head was racing with excited characters, ways to discover the social issue most important to me, and past anecdotes that illustrated the power of empathy and the hard yet family centered life of the rural poor in Upstate New York.
This urge to write stayed with me until the end of my shift. I felt centered and full of light. For the first time in months, I felt like I was digesting social change material that spoke to me. No violent revolutions, no dichotomies, no labels write on post-it notes and mentally stick to people's back. No pessimism. I was reading about empathy, connection, honesty, authenticity, and thought all changing the world. I was reading about change happening at the level of the individual, at the level of the writer and the reader, and this individual change reaching out like a ripple in Lake Cayuga.
The excitement stayed with me. When I got home it was still there. But did I write? Did I produce anything? Did I even produce junk that could later be sifted through, leaving behind only the original thoughts, phrases, and honest observations? No, of course not.
I chose to consume instead. I ate dinner and watched Gosford Park, and through the whole thing marveled at the beautiful scenery and dresses, joyously watched and listened for snark British one-liners, and enjoyed the underlying commentary on humanity and the evils of power and oppression. How can we take away a persons life, making them nothing more than a servant, meant to notice only us, our needs, our wants, even anticipate these things before they are in our awareness? Why do we allow others to take away our lives? Why do we begin to identify not with ourselves, but with those who control us, those who are held higher in society, and those who oppress us?
I thought an consumed. My thoughts may be considered a production of sorts. But to me they were nothing more than energy. The energy that was used to produce the movie was broken down in my mind to its smallest parts. The thoughts were nothing more than the concrete illustration of a transfer of energy. It was my responsibility, as it was after reading Pipher's words, to take that energy and use it to create. But I did not. I went to sleep.
I've wrote about this consumption vs production issue in this blog before. It was during my summer in Berkeley and I wanted to write so badly, the energy that I was consuming was so powerful and transformative, yet I only managed to post a few blogs and send a few smiles. Although my addition to conversation that summer were deep and meaningful, which hasn't been the case since I've come back to Clark. Those conversations, I believe, do count as production. I was passing the energy further, creating my own rippling waves.
When I looked at the stagnation of my writing then. My over consumption and under production, I had decided was mostly due to what Pipher, and many others refer to as "the shadow self." This is the darkness that comes from fear, guilt, envy, anger and despair, according to Pipher who's major training is in psychology, so I guess this makes her more reliable than most. I accredited fear, guilt, and envy with my writer's block. I was feeling guilty that I wasn't writing. I was envious of all the beauty others were able to manifest and the talent that they had. But most of all I was fearful. Fearful that my thoughts were foolish, that my view of the world was too far fetched. I was afraid that I wasn't able to express myself clearly enough or that what I found beautiful others would find cliche. Pipher used a Mark Twain quote that really seemed to capture this, "The human race is a race of cowards. I am not only marching in the parade, I am carrying the banner."
So, now I wonder where is the fear coming from? Why do I lack the confidence to believe that my thoughts are worth sharing? Why do I keep questioning that I know something?
And then I thought back to my Education and Development classes this semester. I realized that for 18 years of my life I've been in school and told that I know nothing, that there are people out there that have written theories that truly explain my reality, and that I need to read them so that I really understand my world. I've read them. I saw value. I took them as my own theories. I lost my voice. I lost my unique addition to the conversation.
Grad school has been even worse. I feel like I lose a little of voice every class. I read a reading. I am moved and excited. Then I am bewildered at where the classroom conversation goes the next day. Everything I found relevant to my work, everything that I found profound appears to be just wasted space. I read the same pieces, yet still have no place in the conversation. But the point of this independent study is to rediscover my voice, my place as a change agent.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
What Exactly Am I Looking At?
Welcome to my new experiment. The following entries you are about to read over the next few weeks will the product of my independent study, a 7-week study that will be carried out until the end of my graduate studies in May.
Why am I calling it an experiment?
1.)It's going to be interesting to see how far I can take myself in an educational context without classmates to bounce ideas off of, and without a professor to guide the way, frame the conversation, and "keep and eye" on my progress.
2.) This is more of an experiment than a traditional class. I have already begun to see my original game plan (my syllabus)organically shift and transform, which I'm really excited about.
But anyway, I feel like the Master's student in me is getting carried away, writing about the abstract before giving you anything tangible to sink your teeth into. Let me tell you about this independent study!
Here is what the original syllabus looked like:
Writing to Change the World
This independent study will allow the student to look at the power of the written word in social change as well as explore the importance of creativity in social justice work. It will also allow the student to sharpen their writing skills as well as their understanding of audience and connection.
*The layout for this class is based on Mary Pipher's book Writing to Change the World which was based on a class that she taught at the University of Nebraska Writers' Conference
Syllabus:
A weekly reflection will be kept throughout the 7 weeks. These reflections will be on the readings for the week. One reflection will be required for each reading. These reflections will be posted to the blog with a title to be yet determined at http://brandi-possibilities.blogspot.com/. Assignments will also be posted here. The final project will be posted in installments starting on the due date (the professor will get the full copy on this day.) The purpose of this is to create an audience for the students work. Writing can only create change, if there is an audience.
The final project is expected to be a polished final draft. Other smaller assignments are to be thought of as a work in progress, except for the Op-Ed to be submitted to the Telegram and Gazette.
Reading Throughout the Seven Weeks- Writing Down the Bones: Freeing the Writer Within By: Natalie Goldberg
Week 1- Reading: Writing to Change the World By: Mary Pipher
Week 2- Reading: Freedom from Fear By: Aung San Suu Kyi (Memoir)
Week 3- Reading: Local Wonders: Seasons in the Bohemian Alps By: Ted Kooser
Assignment: Personal Essay 4-6 pages
Week 4- Reading: My Day: The Best of Eleanor Roosevelt's Acclaimed Newspaper Columns 1936-1962 By: Eleanor Roosevelt
Assignment- Op-ed to be submitted to the Telegram and Gazette
Week 5- Reading: The Little Prince By: Antoine Saint-Exepurey
Children's Story 4-6 pages
Week 6- Reading: What Are People For? By: Wendell Berry
Assignment- Speech
Week 7- Reading: The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fist-Fight in Heaven By: Sherman Alexie
Final Project: Final Project 10-15 page fiction piece
As I've pointed out this syllabus has already changed in my head, and in the spirit of the amazing social change lessons I received in Berkeley, I'm just going to let this study grow naturally. In order to do this I know I just have to hold strongly onto my objective and then pay attention to the world around me. I truly believe that when you have a clearly stated objective with which you are viewing the world, the answers will come to you. Your attention is focused and you aren't paying attention to things that are distractions.
Anyway, my objective is simple: Find authors who are reaching ordinary, public citizens with real social justice issues challenging hearts and minds, and then learn to do the same.
I am tired of reading journals and writing for academics. I've always been a writer and a story teller. I'm naive, yet intelligent enough, to know that a story can change the world. I've felt stories change me as an individual and I've witnessed stories change groups. I know I am good writer. It is a gift and it's been way too long since I've put it to use.
So, over the next few weeks you will be witness to my rambling reflections and hurried attempts at creation (oh the troubles with deadlines). I am thankful for your witness, but please feel free to join the conversation. You are the closest things I have to classmates on this adventure, and I need you. What are the use of thoughts with out questions and dialogue? My thoughts are always just the foundation to good ideas. I need others to flesh them out and make them clear.
Thanks for your companionship. And wish me luck!
Why am I calling it an experiment?
1.)It's going to be interesting to see how far I can take myself in an educational context without classmates to bounce ideas off of, and without a professor to guide the way, frame the conversation, and "keep and eye" on my progress.
2.) This is more of an experiment than a traditional class. I have already begun to see my original game plan (my syllabus)organically shift and transform, which I'm really excited about.
But anyway, I feel like the Master's student in me is getting carried away, writing about the abstract before giving you anything tangible to sink your teeth into. Let me tell you about this independent study!
Here is what the original syllabus looked like:
Writing to Change the World
This independent study will allow the student to look at the power of the written word in social change as well as explore the importance of creativity in social justice work. It will also allow the student to sharpen their writing skills as well as their understanding of audience and connection.
*The layout for this class is based on Mary Pipher's book Writing to Change the World which was based on a class that she taught at the University of Nebraska Writers' Conference
Syllabus:
A weekly reflection will be kept throughout the 7 weeks. These reflections will be on the readings for the week. One reflection will be required for each reading. These reflections will be posted to the blog with a title to be yet determined at http://brandi-possibilities.blogspot.com/. Assignments will also be posted here. The final project will be posted in installments starting on the due date (the professor will get the full copy on this day.) The purpose of this is to create an audience for the students work. Writing can only create change, if there is an audience.
The final project is expected to be a polished final draft. Other smaller assignments are to be thought of as a work in progress, except for the Op-Ed to be submitted to the Telegram and Gazette.
Reading Throughout the Seven Weeks- Writing Down the Bones: Freeing the Writer Within By: Natalie Goldberg
Week 1- Reading: Writing to Change the World By: Mary Pipher
Week 2- Reading: Freedom from Fear By: Aung San Suu Kyi (Memoir)
Week 3- Reading: Local Wonders: Seasons in the Bohemian Alps By: Ted Kooser
Assignment: Personal Essay 4-6 pages
Week 4- Reading: My Day: The Best of Eleanor Roosevelt's Acclaimed Newspaper Columns 1936-1962 By: Eleanor Roosevelt
Assignment- Op-ed to be submitted to the Telegram and Gazette
Week 5- Reading: The Little Prince By: Antoine Saint-Exepurey
Children's Story 4-6 pages
Week 6- Reading: What Are People For? By: Wendell Berry
Assignment- Speech
Week 7- Reading: The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fist-Fight in Heaven By: Sherman Alexie
Final Project: Final Project 10-15 page fiction piece
As I've pointed out this syllabus has already changed in my head, and in the spirit of the amazing social change lessons I received in Berkeley, I'm just going to let this study grow naturally. In order to do this I know I just have to hold strongly onto my objective and then pay attention to the world around me. I truly believe that when you have a clearly stated objective with which you are viewing the world, the answers will come to you. Your attention is focused and you aren't paying attention to things that are distractions.
Anyway, my objective is simple: Find authors who are reaching ordinary, public citizens with real social justice issues challenging hearts and minds, and then learn to do the same.
I am tired of reading journals and writing for academics. I've always been a writer and a story teller. I'm naive, yet intelligent enough, to know that a story can change the world. I've felt stories change me as an individual and I've witnessed stories change groups. I know I am good writer. It is a gift and it's been way too long since I've put it to use.
So, over the next few weeks you will be witness to my rambling reflections and hurried attempts at creation (oh the troubles with deadlines). I am thankful for your witness, but please feel free to join the conversation. You are the closest things I have to classmates on this adventure, and I need you. What are the use of thoughts with out questions and dialogue? My thoughts are always just the foundation to good ideas. I need others to flesh them out and make them clear.
Thanks for your companionship. And wish me luck!
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